I can tell so much about someone by watching their hands. It would be boring for me to explain it but body language and the hands specifically tell me so much.

I cannot share all that is going on in my world. For a lot of reason I cant and I hate that. I really feel I need a positive connection and someone to sound off to. However, that isn't possible at the moment. I'm not pissy about it really. I'll just say this and it won't make sense to anyone but me probably:

I sat on the floor and she looked at me. My god her eyes are beautiful. She reaches out for my hands and as I hold her hands she looks around as if she is a child. Looking to see if we are really alone. I tell her, "do you want to talk privately? It is ok, we are alone". She looks at me and with tears in her eyes she says "yes, sometimes when I'm alone I get scared". I squeeze her hands and tell her "that is completely normal. I cannot say I know but I can tell you that what you are feeling is a normal reaction". She nods and asks, "may I hug you". Of course I say. As I lean in I have to raise up on my knees and as she puts her arms around me she whispered "thank you".

So I go to my truck to leave and find myself a block away doing my notes and looking at the sunshine. Now I cry and find that part of me that remains grateful for the small things.

It was a good day believe it or not. I just needed to share.